The Room They Gave Me
A Memoir of Care
At twenty-three, Dina Paul arrives at her grandparents’ Central Park West apartment with one suitcase, planning to stay for the summer. They have cleared a room, folded a towel on the bed, made space in the bathroom, and prepared food. Having supported herself since adolescence, she discovers what it means to be expected. The summer becomes seven years.
Paul takes that understanding into the home she makes for her son and into the rooms she enters as a social worker. She is often the person with the file, turning what she sees and hears into a record others will act on. A supervisor asks, “What do we know?” She learns to make the strength of her language match the strength of the facts. Years later, she asks a younger clinician the same question.
Late in her career, Paul counsels Buddy, a former mechanic her own age, in a nursing-home janitor’s closet. His speech comes slowly, and she learns not to finish his words. Week after week, she comes to know him through the work his hands remember and the songs he still knows. She waits for each answer. Her permission to be there comes from a contract neither of them controls.
THE ROOM THEY GAVE ME is an unsentimental literary memoir about the material work of caring for other people and the limits institutions place around that work. It asks what remains when the room closes.
Early responses to the manuscript
“Ms. Paul beautifully captures what it means for seemingly lost lives to be found. This memoir, more than anything, chronicles the journey of belonging. The tender insight of her storytelling took my breath away again and again.”
—Bruce Kelly, MD, co-founder of the Charles George VA Medical Center Creative Writing Program
“It has stayed with me. You do a wonderful job of communicating how much the system misses. Your compassion shines through always. It is such an important book in terms of social work.”
—Flora Colao, MSW, LCSW
“The way you characterize and contextualize the experiences you’ve had is so nuanced and carefully worded. People need to know your world, seen through your eyes and heart. You have a gift in translation.”
—Kelly Riedesel, author of Proud Roads: Poems in the Aftermath of Hurricane Helene (Loblolly Press)
The Room They Gave Me is complete and currently on submission.
For rights and publication inquiries, contact dina@dinapaul.com.
Dina Paul 